I laughed when I realized how many years it took to discover who I am.... by first zealously exploring who I am not

Monday, November 5, 2012

The cost of the Snow

I had a dream last night that our family was going skiing. I dreamed about the drive to the ski resort, getting checked in, renting the equipment. The kids trying on their pants, boots, skis, jackets, everything. I remember thinking the whole time... we don't have the money to do this. How are we going to pay for this? I'm gonna use my debit card and it's going to decline. A majority of the dream was the getting ready part. Then I got to the counter to pay and sure enough.. card declined. I thought about it for a little while this morning and then got busy with my day. I am helping a friend design a logo for his ministry so I sat with him a couple of hours and on the way to pick up the kids from school I thought I need to look up what skiing means in my dream book. But then supper, and homework and wrestling practice all kicked in. I just put my kids to bed and thought I need to look that up. Know what skiing represents FAITH. You know sometimes God speaks to us and we have to really meditate on it. We have to chew on it, pray about it, share it with our close friends. Really digest it. And then sometimes God speaks to us and it's like a "DUH" moment. As soon as I read what it meant. BAM. God showed me. He's going to give me what I have faith for. Jeremy and I are in a very transitional time in our lives. My job circumstance has changed, his, while a great environment, doesn't support our family. So we have been praying and seeking and going God what are you doing? How are you going to take care of us. I've been scouring classifieds, talking, begging, anything to find out what is happening. But I haven't been doing a lot of sitting, or waiting, or praying. This week every  time I got in my car and turned on the radio God said no, turn it off. Pray. Pray. Pray. So I have driven in a quiet car, just praying. While I still don't know what is happening, or what it's going to look like, I do have a peace in knowing that He does and He is going to let me know when I need to know. When it's time for me to pay, I'll have what I need, I just have to trust that He's going to provide it.

I wanted to write this out because I think we all need a reminder of who we serve. A reminder of whose hands we have entrusted our hearts, our families, our needs, our wants too. He makes the snow. I'm sure he can handle the cost of playing in it.